Working with a spiritual teacher

Q: Do we need to work directly with a spiritual teacher to become fully self-realized, or can we awaken our true nature on our own?

A: The most direct and honest answer is that it really depends on the person. Some people are able to achieve a complete awakening on their own, while others need the personal guidance of a spiritual teacher. A definite modern trend is for people to gather spiritual teachings and practices from a variety of different sources, like Eckhart Tolle, Adyashanti, or Byron Katie, and then apply what they’ve learned on their own.

It is also possible to encounter teachers in more subtle ways. Like the right book serendipitously falling off a shelf. Or a message in a movie that speaks to us deeply. Or a chance encounter with a fellow pilgrim who imparts a pearl of wisdom. This is all part of a very real mystical phenomenon known as synchronicity, which is the magical way life has of responding to our deepest desires and intentions to discover and know the absolute truth. “When the student is ready,” it has been said, “the teacher will appear.” In other words, the teacher is not always a person. If we are open to receiving these messages, life itself can help direct our steps on the path.

Still, there are some very convincing reasons why we may also choose to work personally with a spiritual teacher.

One of the main functions of a spiritual teacher is to provide accurate information and proper guidance about how to make progress on the path of awakening. No doubt we are living in an age of unprecedented access to information via the web, which means that anyone with a computer can ask The Great Google all kinds of questions about how to become enlightened – and get all sorts of answers, too.

In my experience, however, this approach can be problematic for some seekers. First, there is a lot of content online that is either partially or completely inaccurate, and many people don’t always know how to tell the difference. Second, gathering knowledge doesn’t necessarily translate into progress. As Morpheus says to Neo in the Matrix, “Sooner or later you’re going to realize just as I did that there’s a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.”

On both counts, working with a spiritual teacher can be an invaluable source of help and inspiration. A good spiritual teacher will constantly encourage you to make progress, and, frankly, nothing beats the live interaction with a real person who can answer your questions directly, providing you with sage advice about possible next steps, as well as potential pitfalls to be avoided along the way.

Another benefit of working directly with a spiritual teacher is that he or she will tell you when you’re not quite on the right track and hold you accountable until you are. I’ve had people tell me during the initial stages of working together that talking with me feels similar to talking with a good friend, so what is the difference between what I do and what they are already getting from their friends?

Well, I have a useful saying that speaks to this: “A good spiritual teacher is your true self’s best friend and your ego’s inevitable enemy.” Quite often our friends will coddle our egos rather than shake them up, in their caring effort to provide emotional support. But a truth-centred and solution-focused teacher has no interest in coddling anyone’s ego. Rather, a good teacher will help you become aware of your ego’s tricky defenses and avoidance ploys, and will offer corrections and feedback that is ultimately more useful and beneficial for your evolution.

And, of course, as with anything we wish to pursue with more dedication and mastery, how we do that is often by learning from a teacher. Want to be better at delivering jokes? Spend time with comedians and pay close attention to the art and science of joke making. Want to become a welder? Apprentice with a professional. Farmer? Intern for a season. And what if you want to awaken your true nature? Live from your most authentic self? Transform the very ground of your being? Same thing applies. Immerse yourself in all things beneficial for awakening your true nature. Read, meditate, reflect, share, and yes, ask for guidance, when you need it, from someone who is awake or has made enough progress on the path that they are able to offer valuable advice.

At the end of the day, we are our own ultimate authority, because it’s our own true nature that we must discover and know. The Buddha said it best: “Don’t take my word for it. Find out for yourself!” That doesn’t mean spiritual teachers have no value on the path. The point is that they show us the way. It’s up to each person to follow the injunctions in the same way that a scientist tests hypotheses using experiments. The only difference is that we are testing out prescribed spiritual practices and checking for results in the laboratory of our own consciousness and lives.